Today is the first day of school here. Micah is an old hat at this now, starting Grade 3, but today is Ariel’s first day of school. She is more than ready. She is excited, she has been counting down the days, and she is READY.
Me? Not so ready. It is a funny thing, this little bit of sadness I have sending her off to school. I also felt it when Micah went. It is not a “teary on the school yard” type of sadness, just a little nostalgic sort of feeling. I have been reflecting on this a little over the summer.
Why do I feel sad? It is a right of passage, she is ready to go, and she was in preschool for 2 years before this! But I have realized that it feels a little like I am sending her out into the world and she is no longer just “ours”. We have to share her now. Intellectually, I know this makes no sense because she has been to preschool, to dance classes, to gymnastics, and, in fact, to all kinds of places without her family with her. But this feels different.
This feels like her beautiful nature is now out there. It isn’t our family secret anymore. She is out there now and will be influenced, positively and negatively, by the big, wide world. I remember having these exact same feelings when I walked Micah off to grade Primary 3 years ago. But I had forgotten until now. I know our children aren’t ever really “ours” but we can kind of pretend until days like today.
It feels like my own special gift has now been shared with the world and it won’t ever be mine alone again.
Enjoy the world, sweet, smart, strong girl of mine. As I said to you this morning:
You are going to love school and school is going to love you!